Ranking the Best Names in College Football

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Oct 4, 2014; Cincinnati, OH, USA; The Memphis Tigers mascot gets fans fired up for Joey Magnifico’s Magic Show during the second half against the Cincinnati Bearcats at Paul Brown Stadium. Memphis won 41-14. Mandatory Credit: Aaron Doster-USA TODAY Sports

9. Joey Magnifico, Memphis TE

Biographical Information: Freshman tight end from Cordova, Tennessee. 6-foot-4 and 230 lbs. Attended St. Benedict High School. No parents’ names listed. Apparently trying to retain an aura of mystery around himself.

Fun Fact from Official Team Bio: “Walkon to the Memphis program.” This is all it gives, and it should definitely say “Walk-on” or “Walk on.”

Why I love the name: Instantly reminds me of a magician on a cruise ship or a psychic who has a sideshow at a carnival, although I could alternatively be convinced that Joey Magnifico is a professional wrestler who wears a mask and cape, has an entrance routine involving a puff of smoke and doves, and loves to do that move where wrestlers jump off the corner of the ring and land on their opponents. No matter what, he’s a man I would definitely want to see perform live, as I imagine I’d at the very least be moderately entertained. JOEY MAGNIFICOOOOOOOOO!!!

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